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The Little Tutor: Princessa

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Tuition given in the topic of Miss Loi the Tutor from the desk of Miss Loi at 5:06 pm (Singapore time)

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A young Miss Loi

Those were the 发娇 days

previously

Perhaps it was the breakfast she ate that morning. Perhaps the principal was in a charitable mood that day. Or perhaps it was just pure luck.

Those little pre-Heuristics & pre-Foundation era questions were no match for her paganistic non-MOE approved mathematical powers, filling the common room with a blinding spell of light as she blazed through the math paper of the Entrance Exam, sending wide-eyed teachers fleeing in all directions. (Alright the last part didn’t quite happen)

With that, the gates opened up for her grand entry (with twin 发娇 ponytails flailing in the wind – God of Gamblers slow-mo style), to take her first steps into a brand-new world …

A world where uniforms were different for different schools, where classmates spoke Mandarin with a strange accent, and where she lip-synced to an alien national anthem each morning.

A world where her by-now-MOE-approved mathematical powers would allow her to no-need-to-study-but-still-can-pwn all exams, tests, and all lame problem sums involving Ahmad, Bala, Gopal and John (who always seemed to have money issues amongst themselves).

A world where she could spin in excess of 100 rpm‘s (correct to 3 sig. fig.) worth of ‘sallies‘ in Zero Point, and where classmates watched in awe as she predicted with deadly accuracy the trajectory of every Five Stones sack.

In a time when songs like that “Lucky, Lucky, Lucky Song“, “You Bad, My Bad Song” (r.i.p.) etc., that *”Rumour Song“, and that “Enter/Exit Song” dominated the airwaves, beng-ish discos (before they were known as clubs), and the Mini-Compos at the beaches respectively.

In a time when her interest in TV dramas started (coz she had too much free time in her hands), and she would made sure she reached her rented home in time to catch a local show involving a Teacher who kept uttering “Ai-Yo-Yo!“.

In a time when Dad was just a distant figure who magically increased her POSB account balance by $30 every month.

In an age when she lived like a princess without a care in the world, save for the occasion pimple outbreak.

Welcome to school, Miss Loi!

To be continued …

*Things haven’t really changed much (music-wise), have they?

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