ONCE AGAIN, the schedule could have been kinder.
For if it was, Miss Loi wouldn’t have to catch another flight departing in an ungodly hour – a flight that made her sleep throughout like there was no tomorrow, causing her to miss out on all the in-flight luxuries like “Coffee or tea?”, “Would you like seafood or chicken?”, “Hot towel? Hot towel?” etc.
When she arrived at her destination, she proceeded to ‘ninja-fy‘ herself with a mask smuggled provided courtesy of Little Miss Loi. Thereafter she suddenly felt a severe bout of thirst, as all those missed “coffee or tea?” began to take its toll.
Thus she rushed towards the nearest oasis of a vending machine, to buy and GULP down an entire bottle of unknown pastel-coloured liquid, and took along another bottle for the subsequent hour-long train journey.
Lovely scenes of Spring flashed before her eyes as the train made its way to town, with Miss Loi constantly taking sips of her drink as she stared at the passing scenes in a dreamy manner.
When she finally stepped out of the train station, she realized that she appeared to be the only one wearing a mask in town …
More critically, however, she realized that her bottle of drink had been sipped dry, and that’s when she also realized that she had grossly miscalculated the holding volume of her … umm … bladder.
With nary a toilet in sight, things got a bit desperate. She knew she had to get to the guesthouse fast – the only place she’s certain a toilet exists – before the floodgates opened.
And thus began the longest catwalk the streets of Tokyo have ever witnessed, as Miss Loi sashayed her way like a geisha past rows and rows of teeny jewelry stalls …
Maintaining the agonizing poise of walking as fast as possible while keeping her steps as small as possible to ensure a ZERO rate of change of the liquid level in her … umm … overflowing bladder, she found herself stared at by this weirdo aunty …
Slowly but surely though, her frantic geisha steps finally brought her to the guesthouse, where she wasted no time in throwing her still-5 kg luggage into her miniscule room, and rushed into the grateful toilet (just when things started to get a little ‘leaky’) to burst open the floodgates put an end to the ordeal …
Miss Loi is currently on her annual hiatus in Japan from 23-27 May.
For enquiries, please SMS or email missloi [at] exampaper [dot] com [dot] sg during this period and she will try to get back to you as soon as she can.
Apologies in advance for any inconvenience caused and she seeks your kind understanding if she’s a little slow in replying during this period.
