BREAKING NEWS: A fire broke out at Novena this afternoon.
A sexy maths tutor was on her way to lunch in Novena when she came across this scene reminiscent of the ODEX street protest:
+ 3 x police cars + 1 x SCDF hatchback
Upon a closer look, the maths tutor was dismayed to find smoke bellowing from a coffeeshop (which incidentally was one of her frequent meal points). A poor old uncle from the neighbouring stationery shop was sufficiently alarmed that he valiantly tried to put out the fire himself using a puny green hose:
that his puny green hose simply isn’t gonna work.
By that time, the STOMP Brigade had arrived and taken up position:
mobile phones, cameras and
a professionally kaypoh mindset
As if on cue, several fumbling firmen (presumably interns) decided to entertain the crowd with their unique ‘watermanship’:
I paid yesterday for your lunch!
After the short performance that elicited muted cheers from the crowd, all eyes were now transfixed on the main event. It was that moment the maths tutor reported seeing a terrifying figure straight out of a scene from a Korean horror flick:
Soon enough, the fire at the ground floor was put out by these heroic men. However, there was still something burning within a chimney (originating from a cooking hood in the kitchen) that may cause the fire to spread to the upper floors (that contains a childcare centre).
So the good firemen decided to treat everyone to a bonus high-risk display of hoisting two of their comrades high up in the air to extinguish whatever sinister object (probably the evil-looking figure earlier) that lie hidden within the chimney, much to the joy of the excited crowd snapping away below.
That proved to be the climax to this year’s Children’s Day performance. As the crowd started to disperse and the more forward-thinking ones amongst STOMP brigade began swapping in new memory cards, the maths tutor decided to hang around to find out more on what actually happened.
Her perseverance was rewarded and she’s proud to report this highly-accurate fourth-hand account obtained from eavesdropping on some aunties and uncles in the vicinity:
oil overspilled → fire started →
cook panicked → cook poured water →
fire out of control → cook runs out →
forgot to switch off electricity →
fire got ‘sucked’ into chimney →
STUPID COOK! …
You get the picture. But most importantly we are happy to confirm that there had been no casualties (apart from one particular maths tutor missing her lunch) from this afternoon’s incident.
Though some unfortunate children from the childcare centre upstairs did end up with permanently scarred faces …
Many thanks for tuning in and to our sexy maths tutor for bringing us this special report from the scene.
23 Comments
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You should join Channel News Asia...
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Don't think CNA will ever report on fumbling SCDF firemen in their news!
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So was the Eeeeeeeeks! guy saved or burnt to a crisp? Totally eerie.
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Don't think Mr Eeeeeks needed to be 'saved' in the first place. Hee hee.
BTW you look like May Phua!
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I am ezaming the pic closely to see got any sex*xy ladies or not! How cum ur pic not inside wan arr?? Oh btw what camera r u using?? Have a nice day!
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HAM, you won't find any. Coz there isn't any to begin with. Didn't you realize the word
sexywas struck out right from the start???曜
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Heee... .seems like many wanna know how you look like 🙂
I am lucky that I met you before ... oh no, here comes the wife, gonna log off now! hahhaha
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-.-"" eh paddy share some insight(or rather unecessary knowledge)? =x
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Yah...CNA might not report on fumbling SCDF firemen, but they sure report on some sure big moth(and the catapilla) in some sungei area today...
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Paddy, the heavenly stars must've been all nicely aligned on that fateful day. Astronomers have predicted this phenomenon may only happen once every thousand years.
P.S. Hope you'd logged off 'naturally'. Sudden hasty actions may send a wrong signal to your wife that you've been surfing some undesirable sites!
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Kiroii, don't ask unnecessary questions! Go back to your studies! New questions shall be posted soon!
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*Back from few rounds of beatings by the wife*
Miss Loi is stunning! I suggest all to take up tuitions from her to see her true beauty!
*Slip S$50 into pocket*
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Hmmm ... so SGD50 is all it takes ...
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Hi Miss Loi,
I teach Mathematics as well and truly enjoy reading your blog. Love your humour and the way you craft your Math questions. Look forward to seeing you... are you hiring teachers? 🙂
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eh but students are filled with unncessary infomations but are classified as general knowledge~ and this knowledge is somewhat exemplary? thus based on tis would surfice~ paddy share share with further details~ =P
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"BTW you look like May Phua!"
Heheheh, well if you say so I won't deny it. Thank you! Everybody, come to my blog, see see May Phua, China Edition.
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may phua from mediacorp? o.0?
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Hello Teacher Chlorine. From your nic, are you sure you don't teach Chemistry instead??
Right now The Temple is 100% focussed on the O-Levels looming ahead. As such all admin matters i.e. (manpower, restructuring etc.) shall be considered after the exams.
Meanwhile, as an honourable Level 10 Maths Guru, maybe you can help comment on some of the students' workings here 😀
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Note to all those looking for May Phua (China Edition). Good things are not so easy to find hor. Exploratory work is mandatory 🙂
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ROFL at your reporting.... sounds like these firemen came straight out of NDP
May Phua? Where? China Edition somemore. But Precious writes like she's from Africa no?
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HighwayBlogger, the first thing that came to Miss Loi's mind when she saw the nic was "Precious .... my preciousssssssssssss". And then instead of a skinny green creature she saw May Phua!
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hahaha... actually she's better looking than May Phua lah!! Precious had some TV offers before but she was too busy with her carefree life LOL
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Wow say until like that. Precious must bury head in the sand like turkey. Oops, but we out of sand?!